I’m a pirate, not a morning personmy treasure map is covered in coffee stains!
Why did the pirate go to school? To improve his arrrticulation!
Ive got a crew of rum-drunk seagullsnow that’s what I call a ‘feathered fleet!’
A pirate’s favorite letter? It’s the ‘C,’ of course! But his true love is the ‘Arrr!’
If you dont like my pirate puns, prepare to walk the plank…of bad jokes!
Why do pirates never take a shower? Because they prefer to wash up on shore!
My treasure is buried under a ‘X,’ but my real wealth is in the bad jokes!
Dead men tell no tales, but they sure can make some funny ghost stories!
I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I steal itarrr, matey!
A pirate’s life is all about the booty… and Im not just talking about gold!
How do pirates prefer their music? In a-capella with a side of ‘shanty’!
Never underestimate the power of a pirate with a good punit will sink your ship!
In a world full of plank-walkers, be a treasure-hunter!
Why was the pirate bad at sports? He kept getting caught in the ‘throw-overboard’!
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rumlet’s brew some laughter before we run!
How do pirates send secret messages? With their ‘argghh-uments!’
Why did the pirate refuse to play cards? He was afraid of getting ‘decked’!
Being a pirate is all about having a fine sense of bootyliterally!
Whats a pirates least favorite vegetable? The turniptoo hard to find on the high seas!
Why did the pirate join a gym? He wanted to improve his seas-ibility!
What do you call a pirate who skips class? Captain Hooky!
A pirates favorite exercise? The plank, of courseget in shape, or walk out!
Why did the parrot join the pirate crew? Because he heard they were tweeting!
How do pirates communicate? They use Arrrr-tificial intelligence!
I told my crew to keep it down, but they just can’t resist a good sea shanty!
What did the pirate say on his birthday? ‘Time to party like its 1699!’
Why did the pirate break up with his girlfriend? She made him walk the plank of love!
A pirate’s favorite drink? Rum-berry smoothiesailing with a twist!
Whats a pirates favorite type of movie? Arrrr-t films!
Ever try to steal a pirates treasure? Good luck, mateI’ve got X marks!
Why do pirates struggle with math? They cant get past the arrgh-thmetics!
A wise pirate once said, The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese!
Sailing the seas is grand, but I wouldnt trade my jokes for all the gold in the world!
How do you know if a pirate is at your party? He brings the rum and a treasure map!
Why do pirates always carry a pencil? So they can draw their own x-ray vision!
Being a pirate is like being a comediantiming is everything, matey!
What do you call a pirate that skips breakfast? Captn Crumble!
Pirate fashion tip: Bandanas hide bad hair daysYo ho ho, lets set sail!
Why did the pirate start a band? He wanted to rock the seven seas!
Whats a pirates favorite game? Guess whos walking the plank now!
I asked a pirate how he stays cheerful; he said, Just keep it buoy-ant!
Have you heard about the pirate’s new restaurant? Its menu has the best reviews on YARRRR-el!
Pirates dont read books; they let their adventures fill the chapters!
Why did the pirate bring a ladder to the bar? He heard the drinks were on the house!
When in doubt, just remember: A pirate’s life may be tough, but laughter is the best treasure!
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