Embracing Irony – The Power of Ironic Quotes part 1
I can’t wait to be productive… said no one who just binged a whole season on Netflix.
I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
I finally realized that I’m the hero of my own story… right after I finished scrolling through social media.
Procrastination is just a way to make time for my unexpected genius to kick in.
I told my computer I needed a break, and it froze. What a sense of humor!
I embrace my flaws. They make me unique, just like everyone else.
I’m not indecisive; I’m just uncertain about my uncertainty.
They say money talks. Mine just waves goodbye.
Dream big, but don’t forget to set your alarm clock.
I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.
Embracing Irony – The Power of Ironic Quotes part 2
If at first, you don’t succeed, redefine success.
I put the ‘pro’ in procrastination.
I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.
Optimism is just the arrogance of not knowing how crazy the world really is.
I’d love to change the world, but they won’t give me the remote.
If life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.
I’m not a complete idiot… some parts are missing.
I finally found my soulmate: it’s my bed.
If you think I’m crazy, just wait until you meet my expectations.
The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Embracing Irony – The Power of Ironic Quotes part 3
My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch… I call it lunch.
I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not too sure.
You can’t make everyone happy; you’re not pizza.
I could agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.
Some days, I amaze myself; other days, I put my keys in the fridge.
I’m not lazy, I’m on energy-saving mode.
They say every cloud has a silver lining—yours must be a thunderstorm.
I followed my heart, and it led me to the fridge.
I work well under pressure, which is why I’m so good at procrastinating.
I’m on a whiskey diet—I’ve lost three days already.
Embracing Irony – The Power of Ironic Quotes part 4
If I had a dollar for every time I had a good idea, I’d be broke.
I don’t need therapy; I have my WiFi.
My phone battery lasts longer than most of my relationships.
Being an adult is like folding a fitted sheet; no one really knows how.
Self-control is like my bank account: I have barely any.
Perfection is overrated; I prefer ‘perfectly imperfect.’
I wonder if the Beatles were right; is love really all you need? Asking for a friend who needs a loan.
I dream of a better world, but I wake up in the same old one.
Reality called, so I hung up.
Every time I get a new idea, I immediately forget it. It’s like my brain is a leaky bucket.
Embracing Irony – The Power of Ironic Quotes part 5
Nothing makes a person feel more alive than a high-speed internet connection.
I might not be a photographer, but I can definitely picture a nap.
I told myself I should stop procrastinating, but I don’t feel like it.
Sarcasm: because beating the crap out of people is illegal.
I finally understand the meaning of life: naps and snacks.
