Hilarious Weed Quotes to Spark Your Laughter

Hilarious Weed Quotes to Spark Your Laughter part 1

I don’t always smoke weed, but when I do, I forget why I came into the room.

My favorite exercise? Running out of snacks while high.

I was gonna quit smoking weed, but I can’t find the time.

I told my plant to grow tall, but it just keeps asking for more light.

If you’re too high to remember your next thought, don’t worry; it’ll come back… eventually!

Weed is like a magic wand that turns every snack into a gourmet meal.

I asked my weed for advice, but it just told me to chill.

Why did the stoner cross the road? To get to the other side… of the couch!

Baking cookies while high: the only time you’re allowed to eat the dough!

I don’t need therapy; I just need a good strain and a comfy couch.

Hilarious Weed Quotes to Spark Your Laughter part 2

My brain has a ‘buffering’ symbol every time I smoke.

The only high I care about is the one I get from my favorite strain!

I thought I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure—especially when I’m high.

Stoner logic: If we aren’t supposed to eat midnight snacks, why is there even a fridge?

High thought of the day: Clouds are just lazy cotton balls floating in the sky.

You know you’re high when you start talking to your nachos.

I’m not lazy; I’m just on energy-saving mode.

Potheads come in two varieties: optimistic and really optimistic!

Let’s get baked and explore the wonders of the fridge.

Forget love; I’d rather fall for a fat joint!

Hilarious Weed Quotes to Spark Your Laughter part 3

My motivation for the day? Roll, smoke, repeat.

Life is short; smoke the good stuff first!

I prefer my plants in pots, not on the windowsill trying to judge me.

Why don’t we ever see the headline ‘Stoner wins the lottery’? Because they’d forget the ticket!

A day without weed is like… just kidding; I have no idea.

I might not know what I want, but I sure know what I’m craving!

When life gives you lemons, trade them for weed!

Do you ever just sit back and think… oh wait, I forgot!

Being high is like being wise without the responsibility.

Let’s be honest; the couch is the ultimate destination.

Hilarious Weed Quotes to Spark Your Laughter part 4

Life’s a joint; sometimes you just gotta pass it!

My spirit animal is a sloth on a high cloud.

When in doubt, roll it out!

I tried to organize my thoughts, but they just rolled away.

I’d make a great astronaut—just floating around in space with a blunt.

The best kind of weather is weed weather.

I don’t just think outside the box; I’m high on the roof!

High on life? More like high on snacks!

The best part of waking up is realizing you forgot to roll last night.

I like my coffee like I like my weed: strong, bold, and a little hazy.

Hilarious Weed Quotes to Spark Your Laughter part 5

If only my motivation matched my munchies!

I’m not avoiding responsibilities; just socially distancing from them.

Weed: my favorite mood stabilizer.

Why worry about adulting when you can just keep toking?

Who needs a GPS when you can just follow the snack trail?