Quotable Wisdom from the Heartland – A Collection of Classic Redneck Quotes part 1
I’m not saying I’m a redneck, but my GPS is programmed to avoid all paved roads.
If you can’t find me, just look for the nearest BBQ pit.
I have a degree in backroad navigation and a master’s in tailgate parties.
You know you’re a redneck when your home has more wheels than walls.
Why go to the gym when you can lift a cooler full of beer instead?
I keep my friends close and my ammo closer.
I don’t get lost; I just enjoy scenic detours.
The only thing I take seriously is my fishing line.
You can take the boy out of the country, but you can’t take the country out of the boy.
Cousin marriages: keeping the family tree nice and bushy.
Quotable Wisdom from the Heartland – A Collection of Classic Redneck Quotes part 2
My idea of multitasking is spitting and chewing at the same time.
I’m not a redneck; I’m just a small-town delicacy.
You might be a redneck if your dog rides shotgun more than your spouse.
I put the ‘fun’ in dysfunctional family reunions.
Who needs a vacation? My backyard is practically a resort.
If there’s a will, there’s a way… especially if it involves a truck.
I don’t need no therapist; my tractor listens just fine.
My favorite exercise is running out to the mailbox.
Some people call it clutter; I call it my personal treasure trove.
You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy fried chicken, and that’s pretty dang close.
Quotable Wisdom from the Heartland – A Collection of Classic Redneck Quotes part 3
Nothing says love like a homemade moonshine.
I’d give you the shirt off my back, but I’m probably wearing a camouflage.
The only ‘disaster preparedness’ plan I have involves extra BBQ sauce.
Our family tree doesn’t branch; it twirls.
If I had a dollar for every time I went fishing, I’d have enough for a new boat.
I don’t need fancy clothes; I’ve got my Sunday best overalls.
They say money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy a four-wheeler.
My definition of a gourmet meal? Hot dogs on a stick.
You might be a redneck if your idea of a romantic evening is a bonfire.
I don’t judge people; I just avoid eye contact at family gatherings.
Quotable Wisdom from the Heartland – A Collection of Classic Redneck Quotes part 4
My favorite view? The one from my front porch with a cold drink in hand.
I’ve got a PhD in BBQ and a double major in deer hunting.
Why make plans? We’ll just see what the day brings over a cold one.
If life gives you lemons, make lemonade… then add whiskey.
I don’t need a therapist; I’ve got a fishing pole and my dog.
If it ain’t broke, it’s probably just a little rusted.
Real luxury is having enough space for all my lawn ornaments.
The best way to make friends? Offer to help with a DIY project.
You might be a redneck if your wedding reception is held in a barn.
I don’t need a calendar; I can count the seasons by the number of fishing trips.
Quotable Wisdom from the Heartland – A Collection of Classic Redneck Quotes part 5
I like my coffee like I like my roads: strong and bumpy.
When life gets tough, just add more butter and salt.
A day without fishing is like a day without sunshine.
You know you’re living the dream when your only worry is which cooler to take.
If it ain’t got a motor, I just ain’t interested!
