Quotable Wisdom from the Heartland – A Collection of Classic Redneck Quotes

Quotable Wisdom from the Heartland – A Collection of Classic Redneck Quotes part 1

I’m not saying I’m a redneck, but my GPS is programmed to avoid all paved roads.

If you can’t find me, just look for the nearest BBQ pit.

I have a degree in backroad navigation and a master’s in tailgate parties.

You know you’re a redneck when your home has more wheels than walls.

Why go to the gym when you can lift a cooler full of beer instead?

I keep my friends close and my ammo closer.

I don’t get lost; I just enjoy scenic detours.

The only thing I take seriously is my fishing line.

You can take the boy out of the country, but you can’t take the country out of the boy.

Cousin marriages: keeping the family tree nice and bushy.

Quotable Wisdom from the Heartland – A Collection of Classic Redneck Quotes part 2

My idea of multitasking is spitting and chewing at the same time.

I’m not a redneck; I’m just a small-town delicacy.

You might be a redneck if your dog rides shotgun more than your spouse.

I put the ‘fun’ in dysfunctional family reunions.

Who needs a vacation? My backyard is practically a resort.

If there’s a will, there’s a way… especially if it involves a truck.

I don’t need no therapist; my tractor listens just fine.

My favorite exercise is running out to the mailbox.

Some people call it clutter; I call it my personal treasure trove.

You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy fried chicken, and that’s pretty dang close.

Quotable Wisdom from the Heartland – A Collection of Classic Redneck Quotes part 3

Nothing says love like a homemade moonshine.

I’d give you the shirt off my back, but I’m probably wearing a camouflage.

The only ‘disaster preparedness’ plan I have involves extra BBQ sauce.

Our family tree doesn’t branch; it twirls.

If I had a dollar for every time I went fishing, I’d have enough for a new boat.

I don’t need fancy clothes; I’ve got my Sunday best overalls.

They say money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy a four-wheeler.

My definition of a gourmet meal? Hot dogs on a stick.

You might be a redneck if your idea of a romantic evening is a bonfire.

I don’t judge people; I just avoid eye contact at family gatherings.

Quotable Wisdom from the Heartland – A Collection of Classic Redneck Quotes part 4

My favorite view? The one from my front porch with a cold drink in hand.

I’ve got a PhD in BBQ and a double major in deer hunting.

Why make plans? We’ll just see what the day brings over a cold one.

If life gives you lemons, make lemonade… then add whiskey.

I don’t need a therapist; I’ve got a fishing pole and my dog.

If it ain’t broke, it’s probably just a little rusted.

Real luxury is having enough space for all my lawn ornaments.

The best way to make friends? Offer to help with a DIY project.

You might be a redneck if your wedding reception is held in a barn.

I don’t need a calendar; I can count the seasons by the number of fishing trips.

Quotable Wisdom from the Heartland – A Collection of Classic Redneck Quotes part 5

I like my coffee like I like my roads: strong and bumpy.

When life gets tough, just add more butter and salt.

A day without fishing is like a day without sunshine.

You know you’re living the dream when your only worry is which cooler to take.

If it ain’t got a motor, I just ain’t interested!